Soap Box: Phrases Christians Need to Stop Saying

The way we talk about God matters more in our witness than we have any idea. So it’s worth taking the time to reconsider our speech. And there are a few phrases that Christians say that make me cringe, so I want to address those today. And then I’ll quickly step off the soapbox.

Smacked Upside the Head

One phrase is when they say, “So God smacked me upside the head with a 2×4.” I used to say it myself. It seemed like it’s just what people say. But the more I thought about the phrase, the more it broke my heart. I realized it’s a very unhealthy way of talking about God. last time I heard a woman talk about God hitting her upside the head with a 2×4, I was at a conference. And I interrupted her story right then and there. I said, “No, maam. He doesn’t do that.” With the mercy of God’s heart for her and with tears in my eyes, I cupped both my hands gently around her face and said, “God never hits his children. He whispers to them.” I don’t know how the woman was treated as a child or in her own household as an adult, but speaking the truth that God never hits his kids upside the head with a 2×4 broke some deep lie within her heart. Tears fell quick and heavy and she experienced the mercy and kindness of God for the first time, maybe ever.

I know a lot of people who don’t have a background with an abusive father and they just say that phrase flippantly, carelessly. But I’m asking God’s kids to think through the power of our words today and please stop this talk about the 2×4 business, because we wrongly represent His loving kindness when we talk like that. If you want to say He got your attention, then say He got your attention. But do not paint a picture of God being an abusive or violent father. There are so many dear people in the world who already cringe at just the name “Father” because their earthly dad was such a poor representation of the Father’s heart and attitude towards His children. So lets not add to the misrepresentation of who God is, please.

Using you

The other phrase that I think needs to stop is when people talking about God “using” you. Christians say it like a compliment, “Well, God’s really going to use you to do big things.” I get the heart behind it. I think they’re trying to say you have a big purpose in life. But this whole, “Lord, I want to be used by you” type of language needs to be nipped in the bud, if you ask me.

Have you ever had a friend use you? Have you ever had a boyfriend use you? It’s a horrible feeling. It strips away your sense of worth and value. Using someone is a form of abuse for self-seeking motives. It’s actually the complete opposite of what love is. Love lays your life down for your friends. Love is self-sacrificing service for others. Love says I value your life more than my own. Jesus lived His life loving us, not using us. Love is the opposite of using someone. Again, talking about God “using” someone is just a horrible way of misrepresenting the Lord to a people who want to know God and what He’s about. And if they have any abuse in their background and hear that God uses people, they’ll want nothing to do with Him!

It’s about your witness.

Christians often help the enemy out when they talk like this. God does not hit his children upside the head with 2x4s. Nope. He cups His hands gently around your face and smiles kindly and whispers. That’s how He really gets the attention of His children. God doesn’t use His kids to get His own way. Nope. He invites His children into a greater purpose, a kingdom way of life, and to be part of the redemption story that He’s writing in this earth. God whispers. God invites. And He does so gently and kindly. Without one bit of control, manipulation, or false motives.

The way we talk about our Father in Heaven matters. So please, let’s think through our word choices. Because whether you believe it or not, there are many people in your life who are curious about Jesus and God the Father and the Holy Spirit and they are listening to your every word and watching how you live your life. They are wondering if they want to get to know God the way you do. So lets quit talking like God uses and abuses people. Repent if you’ve been doing that. It’s not funny. It’s not honest.

Ok. Stepping off that soap box now. Thank you for your consideration.