Butterflies: New Beginnings and Grieving the Old

Remember learning about the life cycle of butterflies in elementary school? The caterpillar builds the cocoon around him and then he actually melts into a liquid form. With the wonder of God’s creative power, that liquid form transforms into a butterfly. One of God’s most whimsical little creatures. In our family, butterflies are a symbol of new beginnings. A symbol that the old is gone and the new is on its way.

But every new chapter means another chapter must end. There is a grief that comes with new things because it means the old things are passing away. And we can honor that. But what we can’t do is let that grief steal away the good in the new.

Every time our family got orders to move to a new state, I started to see an abundance of butterflies on my afternoon walks or morning strolls. This started on our first military move from Colorado to Florida. I had a puppy and a newborn baby swaddled up on my chest. We’d go walking our familiar paths. As I prayed through the move on those walks, telling God my concerns and prayers, tiny yellow butterflies flew right out in front of me. This happened repeatedly for months as I prepared for that first move. Those tiny yellow butterflies were a picture of hope with wings.

It happened again when we got orders for our second move, that time with a puppy, a newborn, and now a toddler holding my hand on our walks.  Those butterflies reminded me that even though I was so worried about moving to Florida, it ended up being the most loving beautiful community. It was a massive culture shock to move where we knew nobody, but it ended up becoming home and family. So even though I was grieving leaving, those butterflies showed up once again as we prepared to say our goodbyes. For a few months, they would just pop up in front of me on our path. I had to trust if God can bring good new things out of a really hard move once, then He can do it again.

After recent whiplash of God showing me we need to move, I don’t remember seeing very many butterflies. This move was totally different. I didn’t have the military giving us orders months in advance. I didn’t have my late husband to talk out all the decisions by phone. I didn’t have advance notice either. God just instructed me to move and do it now. So sheesh. It was a totally different move. This time, I had a teenager, a tween, a bunny, and a hamster in tow. I never saw that coming! And I didn’t see butterflies as I prepared for this move.

When you’re already wondering if you are really hearing God, then you’re extra looking for confirmations. He gave me tons and plenty along the way. But the confirmations didn’t come until after I took steps in faith.

I didn’t see butterflies until the last 2 days of driving across the country. And this time, it felt supernatural. I started to notice butterflies floating in slow motion right in front of the car driving 75 mph down the highway. I’m not sure I have ever seen that in my life! This happened with greater frequency the closer we got to our destination. Each time, they caught my attention and brought me hope… Each flutter across my path whispered, “New beginnings. New beginnings.”

And they were a different color this time. All the previous moves were yellow or orange butterflies. These were darker with blue.

“Behold, I am doing a new thing! Don’t you perceive it?” Isaiah 43:18-19

And this time, I’m painfully aware of that stage butterflies go through where they melt into what looks like death and darkness. That’s a critical part of the process of making such a beautiful new thing. It’s the crushing. It’s the valley. And it’s the foundation God uses to make new life, new beginnings. Old things must pass away so the new things can come. And yes, that point in the journey is dark. It’s painful.

But we must take heart and know that this is the very substance God will turn into something new, something extraordinarily beautiful. So we fix our gaze heavenward and on what’s to come. The old has passed away. A new beginning is here.